43things

I recently started up an account on 43things. I hope that by setting some goals, I will find them easier to achieve. I tried to link it up to my blog but it wouldn't let me...which was disappointing. Nevertheless, I shall endeavour to post the entry and the link in a post here. http://http://www.43things.com/person/BrightDelicate My first entry was as such: Write a list of all my heroes, teachers, guides, mentors and inspiration leaders. "Loving sparkly, inspirational people" I think that everyone should grab hold of what inspires them. Sources of inspiration empower us and lift us up to new places, or out of the emotional ditch that we have fallen into. Find out who inspires you, emulate them, surround yourselves with that which comforts you. Let's support eachother. Here are my first three sources of guidance and inspiration, in no particular order: 1. My mother. I know that many people would argue that children are in some ways obligated to say this or think it. But I don't agree. Not everyone is a good parent. My mother is. Supporting, loving, the most patient and giving; her smile and glittering eyes light up the room and she makes life wonderful for all that know her. She gives the best hugs and surprises and also loves to make little treats to bolster peoples self-esteem at work. Beautiful. 2. SARK. Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy. Writer, poet, artist, wild-woman, life-lover and liver extraordinaire. Her books are filled with such joy and spirit and heart that it is honestly infectious. Sound advice and wisdom, she will take you under her wing. Glorious. 3. Cassandra Mortmain. Protagonist/heroine from one of my favourite novels: "I Capture the Castle." Not only is this a must read but the characterisation is genuine, heart-felt and real. Follow her wit and wonder throught the throwes of life and it's ups and downs, especially where love is concerned. I will never tire of her zest for discoving the joys of life. I aim to compile a list of around 10-15 fonts of inspiration. :)

Go for it/Wonder Woman/hibernation/incubator-time

I finished my final shift today at 16.00. Suprisingly, I didn't feel as deflated as I thought I might. That aside, two of my collegues cried and one was so upset that she left without saying goodbye!!! Cripes. There was no fanfare, no pomp, cards or what-not; most people didn't even know that I was leaving. We always knew how disposable we are to a conglomerate...

As I strode past the picture of Wonder Woman in the 'M.A.C' window, thinking about the last time I contemplated her (when I handed in my notice two weeks ago), I feel like I've come a long way. I know how best to support myself.

My 'aunt' Ellie told me on Saturday, to "Go for it!" with regards to my S.E.O.U.L. and I shall. "Go for it! Go for it!" Waunderlust...

And now I settle into my new routine of down-time and getting thngs done. Productivity here I come.

Sorry this was brief. x

Gumption.

Today I was thinking about the concept of leading ladies. The I thought about one of my idols, Kate Winslet, a truely wonderful leading lady. In The Holiday Eli Wallach's characte, Arthur Abbott, says that she needs to stop being the best friend and start being the leading lady in her own life, because that is the role that she is meant to play. I want to take many leaves out of this book and start being the leading lady of my film. It's time to reclaim my fabulousness, perhaps we can all do this together, supporting and loving each other through the difficult moments. Let's show off out best bits!!!

Iris reclaimed her gumption, I think it's time that I started wearing mine again.

Millefiore

I love it when things happen that seem like coincidence, but aren't actually. These are moments when the planets or stars align, when tiny pieces of the huge jigsaw fall into place.

Tonight me and my mother, who is a mosaic and stained-glass artist, were sat at the table looking through the most recent additions of millefiore to her collection, picking out the chiocest pieces. We decided to guess which of the delicate slices were each others favourites; I picked similar. She picked exactly the pieces that I had in mind, in the order in which I picked them in. Wonderful. We laughed a lot. We are obviously closer than I thought, it's a comforting thought.

Stars, hearts, flowers, swirls, luminous, incandescent, twinkling, sparkling...

Entering the void.

Here is what I wrote on my Facebook wall last night:

"Pleased to be re-entering the void. Who knows what possibilities may appear? Going back to measuring time by cups of tea consumed will be a true joy compared to measuring it by how many arses one had had to kiss. Pen will grace paper, head the pillow and the mind the infinite escape of the imaginiation."

It's funny, I think the last time I wrote anything which had any quality, like this arguably has, was probably when I was in Korea, when I first started this blog. I think that I am only able to write when I feel free and, although for various reasons I do not currently feel overly free, I feel that I am freeing myself by making choices. I decided to quit my job. I hate it, it's draining and I will be better off without it. Understandably, I realise how fraught the whole employment situation currently is and, believe me, I am grateful for the opportunities and the like that I have been offered, but I can't be there. I have another job and I will find another way to make everything fall into place.

For the first time in a long time I feel liberated; I can read all that I want, write, cook, take photos, SMILE, study what I want to study. It will be wonderful, albeit sometimes tinged with guilt and feelings of faliure or, rather, fear of potential failiure because of abscence of money that I could be earning from said job that I hate....but I am willing to accept that if it means less piece of mind and more peace of mind.

As a small side, I am considering dermal fillers...this isn't the mind of a twenty-one year old....